Dimpy smiles a lot, in her sleep (touchwood). And she takes her smile from me, tilted towards the right side!!
When I look at her smile, I don't know if I should love her father for giving her or I should love me for creating her.
Then I win hands down!!! :)
Friday, April 24, 2009
Monday, April 20, 2009
A toast to my husband
Finally we have Dimpy in our lives. Our princess arrived last sunday - on 12th April 2009. Suddenly she is the pivot of our world; I guess it's the same with all parents :)
Now that I am done with my pregnancy and am holding my bundle of joy, I have some time at hand, in between her naps and diapers (Dimpy doesn't give me a lot of time, but still any amount of me-time is always important)
I hereby wish to publicly raise a toast to my husband. I owe it to him for having put up with my tantrums and mood swings for the past 9 months.
Looking back, I do realize that I have been a pain in the arse; being the perfectionist that I am, the pregenancy hormones just made it worse! (not that I am any better human being now, I was, still am, and will always remain a certified bitch)
- When I was trying to cope with my own mood swings, he smiled through them all with no complaints
- When I was busy screaming about my weight gain, he was there telling me that I look cute (in his own not-so-romantic way)
- When I was spending long hours at work, he was at home every evening, trying to make it special for me
- When everyone thought I was being nasty and bitchy, he was busy reading pregnancy books to identify why I behave the way I do
- When I insisted that I cannot take a day off at work, he took time off to drop me at work coz I was too pregnant to drive
- When it was embarrasing to go out for a coffee with me, given the way I looked, he held my hand and was proud to be seen with me
- When I felt like shouting for no reason, he always listened
- When I criticized him, he only told me to be calm and tried harder to keep me happy
- When in rage I told him I don't love him at all, he just smiled and said he was sure I will come back to him always
He was right, as always. No matter what, I will go back to him. He is the only one who has stood by me when I have been the most lonely soul on earth.
He has stood by me at all times, the worst ones being the most important. He was there when I was heart broken, he was there when I needed a shoulder to cry on. He has been a true friend indeed - for 9 years now. And I am happy that I married my best friend.
Now that I am done with my pregnancy and am holding my bundle of joy, I have some time at hand, in between her naps and diapers (Dimpy doesn't give me a lot of time, but still any amount of me-time is always important)
I hereby wish to publicly raise a toast to my husband. I owe it to him for having put up with my tantrums and mood swings for the past 9 months.
Looking back, I do realize that I have been a pain in the arse; being the perfectionist that I am, the pregenancy hormones just made it worse! (not that I am any better human being now, I was, still am, and will always remain a certified bitch)
- When I was trying to cope with my own mood swings, he smiled through them all with no complaints
- When I was busy screaming about my weight gain, he was there telling me that I look cute (in his own not-so-romantic way)
- When I was spending long hours at work, he was at home every evening, trying to make it special for me
- When everyone thought I was being nasty and bitchy, he was busy reading pregnancy books to identify why I behave the way I do
- When I insisted that I cannot take a day off at work, he took time off to drop me at work coz I was too pregnant to drive
- When it was embarrasing to go out for a coffee with me, given the way I looked, he held my hand and was proud to be seen with me
- When I felt like shouting for no reason, he always listened
- When I criticized him, he only told me to be calm and tried harder to keep me happy
- When in rage I told him I don't love him at all, he just smiled and said he was sure I will come back to him always
He was right, as always. No matter what, I will go back to him. He is the only one who has stood by me when I have been the most lonely soul on earth.
He has stood by me at all times, the worst ones being the most important. He was there when I was heart broken, he was there when I needed a shoulder to cry on. He has been a true friend indeed - for 9 years now. And I am happy that I married my best friend.
Saturday, April 11, 2009
Unconditional?
I took the "How much can you love" test on Facebook! (OK OK.. I know.. what a loser.. but at 1:00 AM when I can't sleep at all.. need something to kill time, you see!)
You are an "unconditional lover" it said!
Unconditional, huh? What's that? Am I really an unconditional lover? Or is it something I would want to be? Is it something I believe I am?
It would have been more appropriate if they said, I am an obsessive lover. I could relate to THAT!
I don't know if I can love someone unconditionally, but I do know that I love someone obsessively. That's just the way I am.. I live life on the extreme. There is no mid-way for me, not for love.. not for life.
And you don't have to love me back if I love you... I will continue to love you the same as long as I will..
Having said that, it does not mean that I don't compromise.. I do when and where it's needed.. (I guess that's what they call mellowing down with age and responsibility)
But deep in my heart, I still am obsessive!
You are an "unconditional lover" it said!
Unconditional, huh? What's that? Am I really an unconditional lover? Or is it something I would want to be? Is it something I believe I am?
It would have been more appropriate if they said, I am an obsessive lover. I could relate to THAT!
I don't know if I can love someone unconditionally, but I do know that I love someone obsessively. That's just the way I am.. I live life on the extreme. There is no mid-way for me, not for love.. not for life.
And you don't have to love me back if I love you... I will continue to love you the same as long as I will..
Having said that, it does not mean that I don't compromise.. I do when and where it's needed.. (I guess that's what they call mellowing down with age and responsibility)
But deep in my heart, I still am obsessive!
Thursday, April 09, 2009
flicked from Aanchal's gtalk tagline
Life is short, break rules, forgive quickly, kiss passionately, love truly, laugh constantly. And never stop smiling no matter how strange life is..
Wednesday, April 08, 2009
Reciprocal love
Someone once told me – “In any relationship, both persons never love the same”.
I may not have believed it then, but I believe it now. One of them always loves more than the other.
That’s just how it is. Maybe, it can’t be generalized. But it holds true for me, and maybe it also holds true for that someone who told me this in the 1st place.
Love is never reciprocated in the same intensity. I don’t even know how you measure love so don’t know if the above statement can be validated or quantified.
Scenario:
-----------
You wait everyday for a phone call. Then you swallow your pride (careful choice of words – pride, not ego, mind it!), and reach out. You have a brief conversation, and then there's “I will call you later tonight”. You wait for tonight. No call. You wait for tomorrow. No call.
This continues for weeks, and then months. The mental grief it gives you is beyond words.
And then one fine day, you give up and don’t call or reach out. You just drop it!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
And suddenly you come to terms with yourself and with everything else. Does that mean you have stopped loving? No. Not necessarily.
But you have certainly stopped expecting, and it doesn’t change anything in anyone’s life. Nothing at all – Only yours. . Once you come to terms with reality, it puts you at ease. Complete peace.
No expectations. No one owes you anything. Maybe an explanation – maybe not even that. Because it doesn’t matter anymore.
P.S. Just when I was posting this, I read – “The brightest future will always be based on forgotten past; you can’t go forward in life, until you let go of past failures and heart aches”
Bang on! How true. As if my mind has been just read! Only – when do you know it’s past? When do you know that thin line between past and present has been crossed over?
I may not have believed it then, but I believe it now. One of them always loves more than the other.
That’s just how it is. Maybe, it can’t be generalized. But it holds true for me, and maybe it also holds true for that someone who told me this in the 1st place.
Love is never reciprocated in the same intensity. I don’t even know how you measure love so don’t know if the above statement can be validated or quantified.
Scenario:
-----------
You wait everyday for a phone call. Then you swallow your pride (careful choice of words – pride, not ego, mind it!), and reach out. You have a brief conversation, and then there's “I will call you later tonight”. You wait for tonight. No call. You wait for tomorrow. No call.
This continues for weeks, and then months. The mental grief it gives you is beyond words.
And then one fine day, you give up and don’t call or reach out. You just drop it!
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
And suddenly you come to terms with yourself and with everything else. Does that mean you have stopped loving? No. Not necessarily.
But you have certainly stopped expecting, and it doesn’t change anything in anyone’s life. Nothing at all – Only yours. . Once you come to terms with reality, it puts you at ease. Complete peace.
No expectations. No one owes you anything. Maybe an explanation – maybe not even that. Because it doesn’t matter anymore.
P.S. Just when I was posting this, I read – “The brightest future will always be based on forgotten past; you can’t go forward in life, until you let go of past failures and heart aches”
Bang on! How true. As if my mind has been just read! Only – when do you know it’s past? When do you know that thin line between past and present has been crossed over?
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