Someone once told me – “In any relationship, both persons never love the same”.
I may not have believed it then, but I believe it now. One of them always loves more than the other.
That’s just how it is. Maybe, it can’t be generalized. But it holds true for me, and maybe it also holds true for that someone who told me this in the 1st place.
Love is never reciprocated in the same intensity. I don’t even know how you measure love so don’t know if the above statement can be validated or quantified.
Scenario:
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You wait everyday for a phone call. Then you swallow your pride (careful choice of words – pride, not ego, mind it!), and reach out. You have a brief conversation, and then there's “I will call you later tonight”. You wait for tonight. No call. You wait for tomorrow. No call.
This continues for weeks, and then months. The mental grief it gives you is beyond words.
And then one fine day, you give up and don’t call or reach out. You just drop it!
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And suddenly you come to terms with yourself and with everything else. Does that mean you have stopped loving? No. Not necessarily.
But you have certainly stopped expecting, and it doesn’t change anything in anyone’s life. Nothing at all – Only yours. . Once you come to terms with reality, it puts you at ease. Complete peace.
No expectations. No one owes you anything. Maybe an explanation – maybe not even that. Because it doesn’t matter anymore.
P.S. Just when I was posting this, I read – “The brightest future will always be based on forgotten past; you can’t go forward in life, until you let go of past failures and heart aches”
Bang on! How true. As if my mind has been just read! Only – when do you know it’s past? When do you know that thin line between past and present has been crossed over?
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4 comments:
i agree that in a rship no two ppl love each other with the same intensity. can't explain it... it just is that way, i think.
aren't 'letting go' and 'forgetting the past' two different things? they don't have to be the same, do they? coz i doubt if it's so easy to forget.
to me, i know something is "past" when i forget to r'ber it. :)
yeah. 'letting go' and 'forgetting' maybe 2 diff things, and may overlap as well.
You can let go without forgetting, or you may let go coz you forgot!
Whatever, the key is letting go and moving ahead. Holding on to the past, has done no good to anyone.
I can remember it every single day and smile, and still let go if that's what's is needed from me!
I am not upset that it's over; I am happy that it happened!
Just read this post of yours and couldn't control to post the comment:
As two human being in the relationship may not be same, obviously their expression of passion maynot be same. And since there is no way to measure the intangibles, how do you know who is loving whom more?
Can you measure the intensity of feeling by expression of the same? Deeper the water, more calmer it is.
Also I agree - I may not forget but I can forgive much more easily. I almost don't forget anything - good or bad... they call it elephant memory ;)
Take care,
Lincoln.
Hi Lincoln,
In your case, they call it elephant memory for more than one reason ;)
on a serious note, don't you believe its important to let the other person know that you love him/her, irrespective of the understanding that you share... else life becomes granted, no?
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